An acquaintance of mine recently related the work we do with couples and families as choosing to get your hands messy with the hard part being to decide when the mess has turned into a quicksand mire and you paralyze yourself as well as them.
Boy did this ring true.
Help is only help when its received….guidance only leads you if you want to be led. We’re not about forcing folks to change, we’re about supporting them once our clients have decided to make healthy changes in how their families respond. There are times in everyone’s lives that we prefer to sink in our own stuff than accept that we have to change our ways to change our outcomes.
As a person who’s personality is full of mercy….I so want for every action a family takes in an opposite direction of what was agreed to be a healthy step forward to be forgiven. And we do forgive when asked and sometimes when not asked to. However we are not to enable others to continue in their inequities or wrong thinking. Its not our place to judge, but at the same time we have to speak Truth in love and set strong boundaries for the guidelines of what we do with stepfamilies and families.
God has so been working with me to understand He called me to work with folks with Messy problems….but only within His guidance. If I allow “self” to take over, I can absolutely slow down the plan….when I try to take “control” I am not operating in love. No matter how frustrating an individual or couple’s behavior is, their actions are their own to choose…..our boundaries are our own to live within for our own goals.
God is good, and I am thankful he continues to teach me moment by moment in this thing called “Creating A Joyful Place Called Home”
“Ecclesiastes 7:13
Accept the way God does things, for who can straighten what He has made crooked?” Remember both prosperity and hard times come from God and nothing is certain in this life”
Isaiah 30:1 “What sorrow awaits my rebellious children,” says the Lord. “You make plans that are contrary to mine. You make alliances not directed by my Holy Spirit, thus piling up your sins. Without consulting me, you have gone to Egypt for help and trusted those who are not trustworthy and tried to hide in Pharaoh’s shade…by trusting Pharaoah you will be humiliated and by depending on him, you will be disgraced.”
We all must continually turn to God, not anyone, or anything else.
